I would have liked to keep this one quiet for a little while, but because of upcoming conventions and of course the need to keep my publishers informed, it seems to me unfair to withhold the news. I have been diagnosed with a very rare form of early onset Alzheimer's, which lay behind this year's phantom "stroke".
We are taking it fairly philosophically down here and possibly with a mild optimism. For now work is continuing on the completion of Nation and the basic notes are already being laid down for Unseen Academicals. All other things being equal, I expect to meet most current and, as far as possible, future commitments but will discuss things with the various organisers. Frankly, I would prefer it if people kept things cheerful, because I think there's time for at least a few more books yet :o)
Terry Pratchett
PS I would just like to draw attention to everyone reading the above that this should be interpreted as 'I am not dead'. I will, of course, be dead at some future point, as will everybody else. For me, this maybe further off than you think - it's too soon to tell. I know it's a very human thing to say "Is there anything I can do", but in this case I would only entertain offers from very high-end experts in brain chemistry."
I am entirely unthrilled. Here's to hoping there's a 2% in Alzheimer's.
Today is an auspicious day. It marks the official start of the process of writing my final dissertation. Yes, after a mer 2 1/2 months of procrastination, I put pen to paper (allright, finger to keyboard) and started writing. I now have 1200 words on "the Critical Reception of Duke Ellington's Re-orchestrations of Edward Grieg's Peer Gynts Suite outside Scandinavia". That's only half of the Critical Reception chapter, which was supposed to be a fairly small part of the essay. And there's still one source I haven't got hold of. I think I might need to cut a little.
I've been putting off writing here for a long, long time, but last night something happened.
It had been a long week, and me and the missus (Eirik) were sat in my bed, watching Snatch and eating psudo-Chinese food. Film finished, and Eririk talked me into going to a party thrown by this girl he's flirting quite heavily with. So we went. Party was lovely. Chock full of stoners, but at least they sat still and talked in soft voices. Music was nice, too. Anyways. We're in the kitchen. I'm in somewhat of an altered state, regaling my fellow partygoers with humorous ranting, when on of the hosts takes something down from the kitchen shelf and dsiplays it. It's a bone. Surely a plastic bone, I think. Looks like a piece of a plastic display skeleton. Well, almost. It was a display skeleton (judging from the metal bits inserted in the joints), but it wasn't plastic. Eeeep! An actual bit of human, in their kitchen. I think it was the upper arm. Or a very short thigh. This freaked me out more than a little.
In other news, my dissertation tutor wanted me to present my research on the Jazz Conferance in Leeds next year. Yay! I'll be giving a half-hour talk in front of scarily clever people. Some of which I have read and admired.
Yours truly is currently in Bergen, soon to be on my way to Stavanger. As it turns out, the stereotype about Bergen being the city of perpetual rain has more truth to it than I originally suspected. I am kinda soggy right now, after walking for twenty minutes to find and internet cafe that actually lets me print stuf. *grumble* Stupid e-ticket bastardry.
My plan of having an actual holiday for once is so far working out great, barring the fact that I've got something of a cold. Meeting new people is a lot better in Norway, for some reason. I think it's because my arsenal of inappropriate jokes is a lot bigger in my native tounge.
What I have been doing a lot of lately, is cooking. Thought I'd share a few recipes. Please note that unlike my cooking of yore, these dishes do not kill you through sheer cholesterol overload.
We're having quite a few people over for food tomorrow. I'm making korma, some kind of madras, jerk chicken and moroccan-ish chicken with orange zest, humous and couscous salad. Should be good.
Ok. The holw surveillance/big brother is watching thing in Britain has officially gone too far. Check this out. It's an anti-benefit theft campaign. Good, proper 1984 style. Also, I wasn't aware they were allowed to have undercover surveillance vans patrolling the streets.
I had my audition for the school big bands today. Best thing I can say is that it was short. It was all sightreading, which I suck at. Happily, so does all the other guitarists, so I might have a small shot still. Eirik's audition didn't go too well either. Small consolation.
In other news, I have watched quite a bit of "House MD" lately. Really quite good. You should check it out. It has Hugh Laurie in it.
NTL still hasn't sent us our broadband bill. the phone bill is paid, but the broadband isnt. On Monday they cut our internet. We're working on fixing it, but we have no way of contacting them now. Most likely I'll be unavailable untilI come home.
I'll be in Norway on the 31st. I'll be in Oslo around 11:00.
Went to the local pub quiz tonight. Now, I know that pub quiz questions are supposed to be a bit hard, but fuck! We got 5 points. The winning team got 37. The questions were stuff like "what is the relative atomic weight of water", "under what circumstances can a 17-year-old, holding a full UK driver's licence, legally drive a bus with 21 or more passengers" and "list the six stadiums hosting the international rugby something in order of capacity". I have met the autists of quiz; the zen masters of trivia. I bow down to them.
I've just got off the phone with NTL. They have not sent us any bills, and our phone account has been terminated. So, I have no phone until they send us the bills and we pay them. Also, switching to another supplier invariably means getting a BT phoneline, which has an installation fee of a whopping £125. So it's fair to say I won't be calling anyone anytime soon.
Our landlord finally came around to remove the vile old carpet in our bathroom. It was gross, I tell you, especially when he ripped it up and we saw the rotting carpet-base stuff hidden underneath. Muurgh. Happy to see that go. Currently, our floor is just bare planks; very rustic, but infinitely preferable to the vileness of old.
And, because you have nothing better to do, check out these two bands from Antarctica: Toofless Sean & Umlaut. One is good, the other maybe not so much. But still. It's a pretty metal place to live.
...goes my right ear. Fuck. Yesterday was LOUD. Loud but good. My mates band DeathQunt is fucking terrifying. Grindcore jazz. Crazy people. My part of the gig went really well, as did everyone else's. We had quite a turnup, too. I'll post pictures as soon as I get them.
Not surprisingly, I missed my first classes today. Oh well. I feel I deserve it.
I have so many socks now, it's almost obscene. And I've thrown away a small rainforest's worth of paper. Some of it was moldy. I think my window's leaking.
I, Aksel Westlund, herby declare that from this day forth the 15th of February shall be know as "The International Mutilate a NTL Executive With Red Hot Pokers Day".
Today, I spent the best part of an hour on the phone with our telephone and broadband supplier. Ever since we moved house, we haven't been getting any bills for phone or broadband. And yes, we have called several times to confirm our adress. But alas. All NTL has seen fit to send us is th VAT invoices, and recently angry notes telling us to pay immediately "to avoid legal action". the bills, however, have been sent to our old house. To further aggravate the situation, the NTL customer servide helpline puts the Cirius Cybernetics Corp to shame in terms of sheer bloody-minded stupidity. Here's a rough recollection of the ordeal:
So break out the hot pokers, kids. It's IMNEWRHP Day!
Fell asleep around 9:30, and woke up about an hour later, cranky and horrible. Eirik, however, who is a great friend and humanitarian, convinced me to get dressed and go to the pub.
I love our pub. Today was Irish music night. People with instruments all over the place, great music, darts and ale. It so completely made my day. This country ain't half bad.
Our boiler doesn't work. You get cold and hot water alternating at 20 second intervals. Helluva way to start the day, I'll tell you. Grumble grumble. Now, I'm not a stickler for personal hygiene, but a proper shower would be nice, nay, necessary right about now. That, and doing some laundry.
My theory is that the whole thing was an elaborate practical joke, set in motion by Hubbard, that's still going strong.
Edit: Internet Explorer suddenly stopped allowing me to view, much less access, skandiabanken.no. It tells me I'm not authorised to view the page. My certificate, however, doesn't run out for almost half ayear. It is quite retarded. Has anyone else (Martine) experienced this? Fucking annoying, that's for sure.
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